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This winter, Shiva Ratri falls like a ray of light between
two stormy days in the high desert of our New Mexico ashram.
It is the new moon of the year when our spiritual solar being
and our emotional lunar being are perfectly aligned and form
a conduit for the Divine to pour through.
This night we call to Shiva by his many names, inviting him to
partake of the feast of our devotion, and to consume any obstacles
that might stand in the way between our smaller selves and our
awakened Selves. In a lavish puja, we feed the lingam all night
long.
During the white watch, we greet Shiva in his quality of newness.
This is Shiva just born from nothing, appearing to have just
been made "manifest out of the void," as the first
rays of the sun catch the mula chakra and give birth to Arunachala.
This Shiva is the child within each of us. This is the springtime
of Shiva's manifestation.
The red watch is when Shiva and his beloved consort Shakti come
together in a dance of ecstatic union. This is the beautiful
Shiva, part male and part female, melded and merged. This is
the "creative" Shiva, manifested as duality unified
- lovely and enchanting. This is Shiva's summertime.
There is a deep stillness in the yellow watch. This is when Shiva
retreats to his cave and sits in silent meditation. This is "Shiva
the wise teacher who is always in bliss," the ascetic hermit,
trasula damaroo. The yoga of this aspect is pure bhakti and the
season is autumn. The color is the gold of sunset.
Shiva rises up and dances during the black watch, at the deepest
heart of the night. This is Shiva Nataraj, whose whirling awakens
all of creation and dispels the illusions of Maya. This is the
Shiva of "limitless time," "fierce and devouring
as the black void." His season is winter when outwardly
we see no life but the sap is flowing deep inside the belly of
the tree, doing its secret inner work.
Finally, all form is stripped away and we grow silent. During
the last watch, there is no puja, no chanting, and no drumming.
This is the darkest hour just before dawn, manifested as utter
clarity. This is the crystal lingam - unchangeable, unlimited,
absolute reality one can see right through, the "ice particle,"
"the face at the center of the lingam." This is the
aspect of Shiva, which resides at the throat chakra "in
the form of formless self." Pure energy.
And so Shiva Ratri comes to a close. By feeding our beloved
Shiva, we have another opportunity to empty ourselves. Jaya Mahadev!
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